IF MY CHARACTERS WERE ON TIKTOK… (A Completely Serious Analysis)

by Tova Rivers, who definitely did not write this at three in the morning with too much coffee

Let us be honest. If my characters ever got their hands on TikTok, the entire app would combust. Not metaphorically. Literally. Servers down. Chaos everywhere. Ronan blamed. Samantha unbothered.

So here it is. The official and absolutely accurate breakdown of what would happen if the cast of Aurora Silentia joined TikTok.

Samantha Moonspire — POV Queen with Unhinged Energy

Samantha would dominate TikTok within forty eight hours. Not because she is trying. Because she is terrifying.

Her content would be:

• “POV: You told me what to do.”

• Knife tutorials she swears are educational

• Wolf transformation edits she did not make but aggressively reposts

• Lives where she stares at the screen for ten minutes, says one emotionally devastating sentence, then leaves

Her comments section would be a disaster:

• “Mommy”

• “I fear you but I love you”

• “Step on me”

• “Why am I crying”

She would reply to none of them. She would not even see them. She is too busy saving the world.

Ronan Blackthorn — Accidentally the Thirst Trap King

Ronan would not understand TikTok at all.

He would post:

• Training videos

• Weapon sharpening

• Brooding in silence

• More brooding

• Even more brooding

Every video would hit two point five million views.

He would be confused and say, “I am literally just standing here.”

Women in the comments would say, “No you are not.”

Julian in the comments would say, “Put a shirt on.”

Ronan would not.

Julian Silvermoon — Motivational Speaker with Soft Boy Energy

Julian would be the emotional support TikToker we all need.

His content:

• “Here is your reminder to drink water today”

• “Healing is not linear”

• “You deserve love”

• “Take a deep breath with me”

He would duet Ronan’s videos and say, “Bro, this is not safe for the internet.”

He would duet Samantha’s videos and say, “Please stop threatening people.”

He would duet Alessia’s videos and say, “Mother, I have failed again.”

Alessia Moonspire — CEO, Mom Friend, Unbothered Queen

Alessia would run TikTok the same way she runs her kingdom. Flawlessly.

Her content:

• “Day in the life of a Queen”

• “How to stay calm while your children summon chaos”

• “Wolf mom tips”

• “Here is how to banish a demon before breakfast”

Her comments:

• “Adopt me”

• “Mother”

• “Teach me your ways”

• “I would die for you”

She would reply to none of them. She is busy. She has worlds to protect.

Theron — Conspiracy Theory TikTok

Theron would be the guy who posts videos like:

• “The Rift is opening again. Wake up”

• “They do not want you to know this”

• “Destiny is a lie”

• “Here is why you are wrong”

He would stitch everyone.

He would have eight hundred thousand followers and zero friends.

People would argue in his comments. He would argue back. He would win.

Ronan and Samantha — The Couple TikTok Cannot Handle

They would go viral for:

• Arguing

• Training together

• Arguing while training

• Accidentally being hot while arguing

• Accidentally being soft while arguing

Everyone would ship them. They would deny it. Badly.

The Wolves

Just wolves doing wolf things. Millions of views. No explanation. No captions. Just vibes.

Final Thoughts

If my characters were on TikTok, the app would never recover. But honestly, I would watch every single chaotic second.