Things I Googled While Writing My Books (Don’t Judge Me)

by Tova Rivers, professional overthinker and Google’s favorite customer

Let’s get one thing straight: I am not on any government watchlist. Probably. But if someone ever reviewed my search history, they’d either hand me a publishing deal or a restraining order.

1. “How long does it take to bleed out from a wolf bite?”

Because realism matters. Also because I needed to know if my character could deliver a dramatic monologue before passing out. Spoiler: she could. Barely.

2. “How to convincingly fake a crime scene for fiction.”

3. “What does emotional trauma smell like?”

Turns out it’s not a scent. But I swear it has one. Probably coffee and regret.

4. “How to curse someone in Latin without accidentally blessing them.”

Because my characters needed drama, not divine intervention. I spent an hour translating phrases before realizing I’d basically written “May your crops flourish.” Terrifying, but polite.

5. “Can rabbits sense evil?”

Because Bunz was acting weird and I needed to know if he was detecting plot holes or spirits. Still inconclusive.

6. “How many cups of coffee before heart palpitations?”

Purely hypothetical. Definitely not personal research. (Answer: fewer than I thought.)

7. “How to fake confidence in front of fictional characters.”

They judge me. I can feel it. Especially the wolves.

8. “What happens if you accidentally open a portal?”

Because sometimes the plot gets away from you. And sometimes you just need to know if duct tape fixes dimensional rifts. (It doesn’t.)

Final Thoughts

Writing books is 10% inspiration, 90% Googling things that make your friends question your sanity. But hey that’s the price of art. And if Google ever releases a “Most Chaotic Author Searches” award, I expect my trophy to arrive with a coffee mug and a warning label.